Hasselhoff, Hitler and complaints

from my performance at the international comedy night in Maastricht, Netherlands:

german mentality

„What kind of silly idea is that, to make an english comedy show in the Netherlands and then bring a german onstage? We’re not funny at all! I mean of all the nations in the world – Germany is the least funny nation! We’re even less funny than North Korea! Geez. No, but seriously, we’re not funny people, we’re angry people, we don’t have joy. We take – stuff!

You know, I had a friend in Holland, I was visiting him and I asked „You don’t mind if germans come?“ and he said „Well, we don’t mind, we welcome them, but only one at a time.“ – So here I am.

We like to complain. We don’t make jokes, we complain. That’s like the german thing, we complain. We’re not happy, if we can’t complain. They have this saying in Germany, it’s called „Früher war alles besser“. Everybody says that, „früher war alles besser“, which means „in the past everything was better.“ Which is kind of a really really stupid thing to say. Especially for a german … you know … Hitler. You don’t see any jews running around Germany saying „ah, früher war alles besser!“.

And it’s not true, nothing was better „früher“, everything gets better all the time! We should be thankful and happy! We should be thankful for the americans like Johnny Hollywood – because the Americans they reunified Germany … by taking David Hasselhoff, putting him at the Berlin wall, standing on top of his speaking car – speaking not singing car – but he was singing „I’ve been looking for freedom!“ and the wall came tumbling down. We should be so happy! Hallelujah, David Hasselhoff!

I know David Hasselhoff is not really from the USA, he’s Canadian. So? Hitler was austrian.

Here’s the video: